March 15, 2007

Khalid Sheikh Mohammed confesses to everything

Letter to the Editor

Apparently Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, the suspected mastermind behind the 9/11 has, after being tortured for several years, confessed to the 9/11 attacks, the murder of Daniel Pearl, plotted to kill Presidents Clinton and Carter, and Pope John Paul II. It just goes to show that torture works. That if you torture someone enough that you can get them to confess to anything. Some experts don't think it's possible for one guy to be behind as many things as he's confessed to. But they don't care because what really happened doesn't matter as long as we can pretend someone is responsible.

His confession provides no information. We don't know if he was involved or not in anything. All we know is that he was forced to say he was. Rumor has it that he also confessed to being behind the attack on Perl Harbor, the sinking of the Lusitania, and the crucification of Jesus Christ. He is currently being tested to see if he is the father of Anna Nichole Smith's baby.

Posted by marc at 04:52 PM | Comments (0)

Gonzales makes Mistakes?

Letter to the Editor

Attorney General Gonzales concedes that he "made some mistakes" as if his firing of 8 prosecutors who refused to participate in Bush's latest voter suppression scheme was some sort of simple error. Gonzales should go to jail for what he did but that's not going to happen because he fired all the prosecutors who had the integrity to prosecute him for it.

Posted by marc at 04:51 PM | Comments (0)